RENT Disney Style
by em91011
Summary: What would RENT be like if it was made into an animated Disney movie? T for swearing.


Disclaimer: I do not own anything

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything.**

**AN: I got the idea to do a Disney version of RENT from the talented The Lark whose stories are amazing. You should all go read her "Disney's The Phantom of the Opera" which is one of the best fics I've ever read. To make this clear: I love RENT more than life. I love Disney too. I just don't think the two things should ever ever ever ever ever be combined. Ever.**

To whom it may concern at Disney:

I grew up on Disney movies and I still enjoy them immensely. I love how you have changed the original Grimm Brothers fairy tales, which were perfect as they were into cheerful, gooey animation. One of my current favorite movies is RENT, and I think that an animated Disney version of RENT would be spectacular. Obviously, it is currently too gritty to be made into a children's' movie so I have taken the liberty of making some notes of suggested plot and dialogue changes.

Sincerely,

Emily

General notes:

Obviously, drug references are out. Mimi is no longer a heroin addict. She is not addicted to anything, in fact, but has a sweet tooth and eats a lot of sugar. Roger argues that eating two much sugar is bad for her. All references to drugs are either removed or changed to sugar references (as long as they all discourage the consumption of too much sugar)

There will be no more homosexual characters, as that may offend some people. Joanne is now Joe (and is now Caucasian so that people who are offended by interracial couples are appeased). Angel is a woman, not a drag queen. For the reasons stated above, Angel is now African-American.

There will be no AIDS. Nobody will be dying. All references to HIV and AIDS are cut.

The show is no longer set in East Village but in the Upper East Side of Manhattan.

The loft is now a respectable apartment on East 79th street. It's not huge, but it's comfortable. The homeless have also been cut. There's no need to expose young minds to poverty.

_Tune-up number 1_

The word "shit" is replaced by the word "shots" The whole song must be re-written into language that young children will understand, as many of them will not know things like the fact that guitars need to be tuned.

_Voice Mail number 1_

This is re-written to be a message from Mark's mother that they miss him and enjoyed seeing him at the holidays (The timeline for the show is pushed up by a week to the beginning of January because we don't want to discourage children from visiting their parents at Christmas. Christmas itself is not mentioned so that people of other religions are not offended). The rest of the song is cut.

_Tune-up number 2_

Benny is no longer demanding rent (children may not understand what rent is and there's no need to frighten them with the possibility that Mark and Roger may be evicted). Instead, he and Collins come to town to visit Mark and Roger and look for an apartment because they want to move to New York.

_Rent_

This song has been cut because there is no longer a need to pay rent. A cheerful song greeting Benny and Collins called "Hello and Welcome" replaces it!

_You Okay Honey?_

This song is cut and replaced by "Hello There," an upbeat, happy song about their meeting after Mark introduced them (we don't want to encourage children to talk to strangers).

_Tune-up number 3_

CUT! April died in a tragic car accident. Roger did not spend half a year in withdrawal, but instead moved on after a suitable period of mourning. She was not his girlfriend (we don't want anything that could be suggestive) but his sister.

_One Song Glory_

Mark and Roger are no longer struggling artists. They are able to support themselves easily but are not famous. This song is re-written into a more upbeat version with lyrics that children can comprehend more easily. It's about Roger wanting to get his big break and become famous.

_Light My Candle_

This song is obviously cut. It is instead replaced by a song called "It's Nice To Meet You" and is set at a brunch held by Maurine and Joe – again, no need to encourage talking to strangers.

_Voice Mail number 2_

This song is cut because adding Joe's parents and the hearing would make the story too complicated.

_Today 4 U_

This song is cut because the idea of killing a dog is distressing. It is replaced by a scene where everyone meets Angel.

_You'll See_

This song is rewritten so that Benny is telling his friends excitedly about his plans to open a toy store.

_Tango – Maureen_

This song is cut because Mark never dated Maureen – it's too complicated. Also, he and Joe have met before, at the brunch hosted by Joe and Maureen (who are married)

_Life Support_

This, _On The Street,_ and _Will I_ are cut because there is no AIDS.

_Out Tonight_

CUT CUT CUT!! This song is replaced by a much less raunchy song entitled "Let's Play Together" and is sung by Mimi to Roger.

_Another Day_

This song is cut and is replaced by a montage of Roger and Mimi playing in the park together and running around (this encourages exercise)

_Santa Fe_

This is replaced by a song called "Toys Galore" in which Collins expresses his interest in opening a toy store. Mark and Roger inform him of Benny's similar aspirations and they cheerfully go into business together.

_I'll Cover You_

This is kept, but the lyrics are re-written into easier-to-understand language

_We're Okay_

This is cut because Joe's career is unimportant (although some lines must be added to show that he is supporting himself and Maureen and their future family) and because there are too many songs for a children's' movie – we don't want them getting bored.

_Christmas Bells_

This is cut and replaced by a much simpler song entitled "Pretty Please" where Roger asks Mimi to come to dinner with him.

_Over The Moon_

This is cut because Maureen has nothing to protest and because protesting is a controversial topic.

_La Vie Boheme (A and B)_

These are cut and replaced by the song "Things I Like" which is a list of the things that each character likes. The list includes rainbows, butterflies, and sharing. It can also include some Disney movies for some free publicity. The kiss between Roger and Mimi (as well as all other kisses except when mentioned specifically) are cut because we don't want to encourage public displays of affection.

_I Should Tell You_

This song is kept but the lyrics are simplified (young children won't understand the simplicity and beauty of the lyrics as they are).

_Seasons of Love_

This song is kept but the lyrics are simplified and it is moved to the ending because as we all know you guys at Disney love having an extra song added onto the end (see: High School Musical one and two)

_Happy New Year A and B and Voice Mail number Three_

These are all cut because the story no longer takes place during New Year's Eve.

_Take Me or Leave Me_

This song is replaced by "I Really Really Love You," a sweet duet sung by Maureen and Joe as they hold hands and explore Central Park.

_Seasons of Love B:_

This is cut because there is no need for it with Seasons already at the end.

_Without You:_

This is kept as it is, but it's shortened (four minutes and twenty-one seconds is really too long for a children's' song) and the line "I die without you" is replaced by "I'm sad without you" so that there are no suicide references.

_Voice Mail number 4, Contact, I'll Cover You (reprise), Halloween, Goodbye Love, What You Own, and Voice Mail number 5:_

These are all cut along with the whole section of the show. Angel doesn't die. Mimi isn't dying. Roger doesn't leave and he and Mimi never break up. These concepts could all be distressing to young children.

_Finale A:_

Mimi is hit by a car. This is replaced by a solo sung by Roger as an ambulance takes Mimi to the hospital.

_Your Eyes:_

This remains the same, but it is sung at the hospital, not at the loft.

_Finale B:_

Mimi dies and comes back to life when one of Roger's tears falls on her face. The whole finale is re-written to be more cheerful and less morbid (we don't want children dwelling on death or the passing of time too much). It ends with a short, sweet kiss between Roger and Mimi and another between Collins and Angel and another between Maureen and Joe. Mark and Benny hug in a friendly, non-romantic way.

**AN: So… what do you think? By the way, before I get yelled at, I know that Finale B is not morbid and doesn't dwell on death or time passing. But it does remind you of those things, just in a way that makes you want to forget about them.**


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